Release and Receive
These last few months have been intense. Intensely healing while purging all that no longer serves me. Old stories, old thought patterns, old ways of showing up in the world, old relationships, and old fears are being released. This is another big turning point in life that I can never go back to, and I will never be the same.
These fears that are rooted in childhood are finally being pulled out.
* The fear of being alone, that somehow loneliness is a punishment. That separation is painful.
*The fear of not being enough, like somehow I have to be more, to be worthy of acknowledgment and love and care.
*And then there is financial fear, always just having enough to get by but never getting to have more to feel safe and secure financially.
*The last fear is that everyone who loves me leaves. The heart of why I try so hard and why I care so much. If I just love them more, they will stay, change, or somehow all will work out if I can just show more love. Because love is the cure, right?
These are all stories from childhood that I've held onto, whether knowingly or not, that have come into my level of awareness. Some of them still play out in my life today. “It’s time to let us go, they whisper. It’s time to let go of the weight of holding onto all of us.”
And so I have. And I continue to do. I have been forced to confront these issues head-on, looking straight into the eyes of the lies. To see where I have been holding myself back because of my belief system. Where I have been keeping myself a prisoner of these untruths.
And also all the freedom available to me if I can rewrite this story.
I have the pen and paper. What does Britaney want? What is the most loving healed outcome for me?
The possibilities are endless as I step into this next chapter. I will tell you I feel so much lighter as I’ve been letting these stories burn away one by one.
My heart feels open, and my face turns towards the wind. I open my arms and let the winds of change take me where I need to go.
Trusting that all happens exactly as it should. Nothing to fix or change. Relaxing into the present moment with full awareness and gratitude for all the heartaches. All the “missteps” or “mistakes” that led me to this exact moment, to be this person, and love people with all my heart. They were not “mistakes”. It was all purpose to get me here, in AZ, to be the woman I am, and create the business and life that I have. So much gratitude for this journey and for this community.
Namaste
